I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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