I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
