I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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