He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
please come you make the beer taste better
Life is so much better after having sex.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
