Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
