fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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