He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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