nut hugger
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
