omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
