Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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