well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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