Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
