Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
