I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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