My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
