no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
