ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
