just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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