does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
