Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
