the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
