The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Your penis caused this!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
