Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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