we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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