remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
