I want to have your abortion
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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