i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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