This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
