I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize