you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Did I show you my penis last night?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
