How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
