Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Randomize
