You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
