I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I won't apologize to a one balled man
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize