All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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