woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
