You smell like stripper and shame
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize