he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
You may now shotgun with the bride
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
