did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
