batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
