I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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