I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm just crazy horny about you
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
