Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I'm both gender and math confused
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
