Your face is a jimmy john
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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