Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
