i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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