If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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