Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
