She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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