Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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